Tuesday, October 6, 2015

Laying Shadows to Rest



Breaking through
each sleeping layer of self
I emerge
from this dark night of the soul

Unfurling tendrils of thought
I feed upon the Light
swallowing whole Truths
in a single gulp
stretching impossibly wide
to take it all in

like Grandmother Toad
drinking down the Moon
in all Her full blown glory

Until,
Light begins to shine
through me

Bright beams of Truth

kindling with my acceptance


revealing Wisdom unguessed 

hidden within my depths

like priceless gems

within the cave of my heart

But you would not see the Truth in me.

Rejecting those beams of Light

just as I was stubbornly blind

to the Darkness within you

for so long

I was not ready to see

your delusions

your jealousies

your selfish ways
your need to be lied to

and led, oh so easily,

down any path

but one of your own choosing

How you loved your Shadowself

more than the bright flashes

I once believed to be the true you

Once so close, in my mind’s eye,

we might have shared the same shadow

you and I

Until the day came

for me to lay my Shadow to rest

When you turned from

my Day bright Truths

in fear and anger

blaming me for all your unhappiness


all your fears come home to roost

once more

as your own children languished

in the barren Night you had chosen

unable to thrive

on the hollow Illusions

that laden your table

Thrust into a bitter Winter

where you blissfully remember

only a Summer that never existed

Only then could I see you

for what you really were

Only then could I embrace

the Night and Day of my Self

In exchange for my loyalty
you gave me betrayal

In exchange for my love

you gave me jealousy and anger

In exchange for a place in my family

you treated us all like enemies

In exchange for each bright Truth

I tried to give you

you gave me nothing


except lies

dark nights to burden my soul

petty pity-me tantrums

 Sugar spun dreams

because they tasted better on your tongue

than the cold ashes Truth would leave behind

I see you now as you truly are

Light and Dark
not just the pieces I valued

not just the true friend

I once believed you to be

I can see how much you prefer

the easy winding road of good intentions

that your imagination

lays out before you

I saw everything with clear eyes at last

Only then could I let go of you

For you prefer your Illusions to Truth

My Shadow,

and I choose Truth,

Light,

Love,

Laughter

over that empty fearful void any day
even if it hurts or takes more work

I no longer carry

the cold heavy stone of you about my neck

My shoulders don’t ache any more

from the burden of carrying you so far

Left beside the road

an unmarked headstone

for an empty grave

where lies the Illusion of who you were to me

Sister

Friend

Fellow champion

of ideals and truth

I find the ghost of my Shadow

has left hardly a footprint

in the dunes of my memories

While the rest of you walks off

towards false horizons

you love more

than the Truth of your choices

Happy trails!

Rest in peace, my Shadow

Until the Wheel turns

Until we meet again

a little wiser for the wear

I hope,

Less willing to offer you

a piece of my soul on a silver plate






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